In my journey as a Life Coach, I frequently encounter Teenagers and Tweenagers.
Teenagers who are bright.
Intelligent.
Expressive.
Opinionated.
And find it easier to speak to a stranger.
I always walk away from my teenage sessions having learnt something new. And I highly value that.
Very often we as parents fret about our child not speaking to us and not telling us 'everything'. So, what should we do about it? Fight with them, force them to tell us? Push their limits?
Honestly, I'd say it may not matter if your child is telling you everything as long as they have at least one 'Anchor' in their life. An anchor is someone who they can tell everything to without fear of being judged. It could be an older friend, a cousin, an aunt or your best friend. If the child is expressing to someone, even if it's not you, you are better off than most parents.
So, encourage them to speak. To share.
With you. With Someone.
Speaking about an experience, however fun or ugly can help them process their own feeling about that experience and that defines whether they are likely to allow the situation in their life again.
Either case, the choice is theirs. But the fact that they have spoken about it and know how they feel about it completely changes their approach to the experience.
For example, the last party they attended may have left them inebriated and not in control of their self. If they've spoken to their Anchor about it and thought through how they feel about being in that state, the teenager will most likely still go to the next party but will know what to avoid or embrace, who to call and the people to hang with.
So, it's pretty simple for parents.
Don't get hung up on being 'the' person they share everything with but do everything to make sure there's at least one anchor in your child's life.